Erica N's Response to Saving Mom

Affirmations:

As I mentioned in class, I really love the ways that Mom's meanness seems to have more dimension in these current rewrites. You haven't lost the notion of jeong, or that the meanness ties her to those around her. But you've broadened this idea to include the ways tat the reverend participates in harsh words and the way that Sunshine repeats patterns. it's really lovely.

I also love the way that MacDonald's encroaches upon the space, and infiltrates all aspects of their lives - even their dreams. I feel like the artificiality, american-ness, addictive nature, and capitalist project of MacD's lends a wonderful framework for this story and family.

I like Denny - who is he? And do I like him solely because he gives Sunshine an outlet? I think If I saw the whole draft I'd probably like him for his own sake. But regardless, I like the introduction of him as a character.

I LOVE how you're not sure who the molestation dream belongs to. It could totally be Harriet, or Rev, or both. Way cool.

Questions:

How does the father's drinking figure into the new draft? How will his monologue to the author inform your work?

Who is Denny (other than Sunshine's Friend)?

After working on our timeline I still have questions about how the Mom and Rev met, whether she was already part of the church when they did, and what exactly the series of events - or really plot points - are between Harriet and Sunshine's childhood and Mom and Rev breaking up.

Opinions/Suggestions:

I hope you continue to play with those WONDERFUL moments where MacDonald's objects or activities are part of conversations and interactions. I love that there doesn't seem to be a prescriptive logic, and YET I completely feel like the world of your play is operating with rules. I guess what I mean is that I neither feel bored/ahead of the convention NOR unsure of the ways that the convention is operating. It's a delicate balance that you've created so skillfully!

I feel a little bit as though Harriet has dropped out of this draft...I think that's probably very useful as you work to understand the other characters in this world, but just know that this time through Harriet felt like the least developed or complex voice. On the other hand, her relationship/alliance with her father about money is an interesting addition.

Overall, GREAT work. Terrific rewrites with really juicy stuff. I'm really starting to see the architecture of this play, and you've managed to retain many of the discoveries and ideas that have come up during the semester.