Erica N.'s response to "The Fourth"

Affirmations:

I just have such a soft spot for this play. Even when characters are talking in their most sexualized and sexist language, I believe that it comes from deep need and vulnerability. You walk a fine line but I think the heart of this play keeps you on track and us invested in these people.

I want to reiterate my enjoyment of the voice-mail sequence. Love it.

I also think you deserve props for being tuned in enough to your own process to know when you need to write something (like the Seth/Adrian scene) for your own sanity rather than to set something in stone.

I think this count as as an affirmation: I think it speaks really well of your play and your and Patrick's process this semester, that the class seemed so much on the same page. Everyone seemed to be most invested in the same relationships, and most felt the same things were missing. This makes me think that you're in a place now where you can really start to nail down the essential elements and ideas of the play, and then concentrate your efforts on action. Exciting!

Questions:

I still wonder about the independence of these characters in terms of their parents. Do they all live with their parents? Some of them? None of them? What's keeping them in the neighborhood? How does Henry play into this dynamic?

What purpose is Jessica serving in the story? I understand why you need the idea of her, but I'm not sure I understand her physical presence. I think partly this is because she's that character that feels like she teeters most dangerously toward problematic gender representation...but it might also be because she feels peripheral to the *action* of the piece, if not the relationships..

Opinions:

I think you've done AMAZING work this semester solidifying conventions, characters and relationships. My opinion is that your next step is to really concentrate on action and plot. What are the big events of this journey? (Also, I want to say: don't be afraid of linearity *if* you want to keep the idea of an odyssey. There's a momentum to the idea of a quest that gets a little lost in some of the flashbacks.) What is the re-cap version of this story? If someone said, "what happens in this story?" and you had to say it back to them with the linking phrases of "and then...", "so," and "but" what would that story be?

I really want to see the scene at the park under the fireworks!

Great work this semester!!!